My Rules (warning: mature content)
I feel like for the last 6 months I have really stopped following some of the rules I had been living by. Doing that got me into a situation that I am very unhappy about. So I decided to write them down for myself to try to remember them. In the process I re-evaluated some of them and added quite a few new ones.
- Answer questions honestly, even if they hurt.
- Don’t ask questions to which you do not want the answer.
- Always ask “why did I do that” before doing it.
- Remember to take the costs of actions into account
- If you are 90% sure that an action is correct, but the cost of being wrong on that path is extremely costly. And you are 10% sure that another action is right, but the cost of taking it is small, perhaps it is better to take the less sure option.
- Don’t forget about opportunity costs.
- Remember there is always a confidence interval.
- You can’t see all of the variables, there is error on the inputs to your calculations.
- especially remember to include emotional variables.
- Your model is wrong, even given perfect inputs, you would be wrong.
- For big decisions, lean on others to help you.
- you don’t need to do exactly as they say, but they should be inputs to your model.
- You can’t see all of the variables, there is error on the inputs to your calculations.
- Fear is the path to the darkside. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering. -Yoda
- Don’t make decisions from a place of fear, but instead from a place of hope. Don’t act out of hate, instead out of love.
- Rules for sex:
- When inebriated/impaired, you can’t go any farther than you have been prior.
- You must discuss what happens if she gets pregnant before having sex.
- Learn from your mistakes. They suck, if you don’t learn from them, they will suck again.
- Be open with your feelings. Bottling them up will not help you. Share them with people you trust, they will help you.
- When you love someone, hang onto the things you love. Don’t worry about the things you don’t love, let the good outweigh the bad.
- Love her for exactly who she is, not for who she could be.
- Let go of her fitness, that isn’t your job. You think she is beautiful the way she is, be honest with yourself on that.
- Walk your dog. Don’t have a dog? Rescue a dog.
- No matter how much a relationship hurts, you can’t push the other person away, you can’t ignore it, you can’t bottle it up. You have to talk to them.
- Never forget the importance of family and friends.
- Let your partner know what you want find out what she wants, then work with her to figure out how you can both get what you need.
- Don’t loose sight of your priorities. And remember to consider that the order in which you chase them is a big deal.
- Never try to go back, take what you have learned and move forward.
- Remember what “success” is to you.
- Don’t hold on too tight, it will all slip through your fingers.
- Don’t be afraid, be measured.
- Stress does not equate to caring and a lack of stress does not mean you don’t care.
- As a child you need to keep your ID in check and as an adult, you need to keep your pride in check. Don’t let them rule you.
- If alcohol is so low quality that you wouldn’t pay market price for it, don’t drink it (I’m talking to you grad student events).